For those who want some good reading and/or to see where this blog topic actually came from:
http://yahoo.match.com/y/article.aspx?articleid=10287&TrackingID=526103&BannerID=730920
Your phone has been silent. No guy approaches you to talk to you. You realize that the only people you converse with are the same sex as you. And the last person you had any type of relations with is now in a serious relationship, with you sitting on the sidelines. Dating Rut. Many of us have been there, more so than others. We have times that when it rains, it pours - and then there are the times when you are in a drought and are just hoping that the next semi-cute guy takes interest in you so you can have someone, anyone, to text and not feel so alone.
After discussing and comparing the ruts that we are in, a friend of mine sent me the article above that describes the different ruts you can be in and how to solve the problems. Well, seeing as this is from match.com and I cant necesarrily relate to it all I am still going to give my own take on these so called solutions and why I think it is easier to say than do:
1. There are no instant sparks - solution: bring out the friend filter.
This part of the article says that when on a first date with someone, dont just brush them aside if you dont feel anything with them right away - that love at first sight doesnt always happen, and to consider them friends and hope that sparks fly later down the line. This is how I feel about this: obviously there were SOME sort of instant sparks to even be on a date with someone. I am not just going to go on a date with the next chump that walks down the street, obviously I say yes because I am somewhat instantly attracted to them. I guess coming from someone who doesnt go out on many dates (and no dont be shocked by this, I have gotten used to it over time) and pretty much every guy that crosses my path turns into the "friend" (even if I dont want them to be just friends) I guess the friend filter is always out for me. What about those of us who dont know how to turn it off!? C'mon match.com, I need answers here!
2. Your date looks great on paper, but thats it - solution: base it on how you are feeling
Okay I am having a hard time relating to this particular one because most guys that are great on resume either 1. pay no attention this way whatsoever 2. is already dating one of my friends 3. has followed number one and went straight into the friend factor. So how do I feel? I feel like I am getting the raw end of the stick here people, how come the good ones are never interested in this?
3. You dont think this person has long term potential - solution: use the "carpe date-em trick"
Well I guess this only pertains to people who are looking for thier very serious mate. I may be looking to date someone, but am not looking to get married anytime soon. So there is no looking for someone with long term potential - just ANY potential for the matter!
4. You swear all the good ones are taken already - solution: look again, at people you usually pass over.
However this one is TOTALLY true. Maybe all the good ones arent "taken" but they definitely arent sending any interest over here and usually are eyeing some other chick. So what this article is telling me though, is that I should take another look around me? In Colorado Springs? I guess I will take this advice the next time I am at Cowboys or Gasoline Alley, the two best places to pick up men (please note the sarcasm in my tone of voice)I wont be so picky to turn down the toothless hick who is asking me to dance with him, he could me my next soulmate!
5. You feel down about yourself and not date worthy- solution: give youself a pre-date prep
Now this is one that we ALL do with our friends already. You know that your best friend is never going to say "you are right, you suck and dont deserve anyone" when you are sitting there complaining about the lack of relationships in your life. That would just be a bad friend. We are always going to say "you deserve the best, you are a great person and someone will like you for who you are" and MEAN IT. Because obviously we are your friends and love you, and are friends with you for a reason. Personally, I truly mean it when I tell my friends that because I only have amazing friends and want nohting but the best for them and to be happy.
So what did I learn from this article? Nothing. It had no solutions as to why I get in a rut, and truly more often than not. However I did realize that obviously I am not ready for the long-term serious committment that most people are looking for on match.com, and hence why I will not be joining that website or any other dating website anytime soon.
I will just hang on for the next guy to show any sorts of interst in me, and then see how long it takes for me to ruin things and become friends with them :)
Monday, February 28, 2011
Saturday, February 19, 2011
What Happens When you Dont Remember?
It's a regular statement made amongst college students and post-college grads who still tend to party hard -
Do you know what happened last night?
Blackout. Blurry. Missing pieces of the night. This tends to happen when large consumptions of alcohol are consumed. Most of us have been there, some way more often than others, where we cant remember what happened the night before. We need the help of our friends to piece everything together or sometimes we use our cell phone to see what text messages were sent or if any phone calls were made - looking for someone to fill us in on the details of the night.
Sometimes this can be scary, especially if you dont know how you got home or where any of your things are (most of the time your things are with your friends or hidden under your clothes on the floor). And it can be somewhat embarrassing when your friends are filling you in on the crazy things that you did the night before - like dancing on the bar, making love to that chili cheese dog that you bought at the hot dog stand on the street, puking in a garbage can in the beer garden only to go back into the bar and buy another drink - all in the name of partying.
But why do we "black out?" Sometimes you cant figure it out - how did I drink so much that I dont remember? The body works in mysterious ways because one can never say they are okay after a certain amount of drinks - it all depends on your mood, your diet for the day (aka did you eat a lot, did you eat nothing) how much water you drank all day, the type of partying you are doing, and the climate/area that you are in (blackouts tend to happen more at higher altitude due to the alcohol moving into the bloodstream faster). In any case - one can never predict when a blackout will occur.
There was a time in college that it seemed like it was inevitable that the nights that I was "going to take it easy" were the nights that I blacked out (and actually still sometimes happens to this day) I remember one incident where I woke up in my bed, tshirt on backwards, laying face up with my hands crossed on my chest like I was laying in a coffin, and uneaten pizza laying right next to me that I had no idea how it was paid for because it never showed up on my checking account and I had no cash on me that night, and my clothes laying on the floor of my bed covered in mud with some mud in my hair and fingernails. And i remember going "What??? I was only supposed to go out for a couple drinks!"
For those interested in knowing what actually happened, apparently the couple of drinks turned into a Cochran barcrawl with people I worked with, it started to downpour during the last leg of it and a couple of us decided to get into a mud fight outside Station, where then I turned and apparently ran accross the street to Papa Johns because I was hungry and somehow talked some guy into buying one for me, he was expecting something more in return but once the pizza was in my hands I bolted and ran home with it and passed out without ever touching it. Thank goodness for friends who whitnessed this whole showing.
Now obviously this is a pretty "tame" situation where one wakes up and doesnt remember anything - but its a good example of how alcohol can have that affect on you. Some of the most common questions I have gotten from friends when they wanted to know what happened last night was:
"How did I get these bruises on my body?"
"Where are my shoes?"
"How did he/she end up in my bed or back at my place?"
"Why do I have (whatever they found) in my pocket/purse?"
"How did I get home last night?"
"I just looked at my camera - I dont remember taking any of these pictures." "
Where did we go last night?"
Usually this is where I start laughing and fill them in on whatver I know happened. I am usually that friend who remembers a good portion of the night to let everyone know what went down (it is very rare for me to blackout and when I do - oh dear!) so I get to be the one to fill them on thier humourous adventures of the night. Sometimes, if I am feeling like having some fun, I make some things up just to get them really nervous.
But blacking out can have some serious consequences if you arent with your friends to help you along the way. Some people black out, and literally dont know how they got home, who they are with, and what they are doing. If this happens and you get separated from your friends, you just have to hope that you are safe. Yes, sometimes the situations can be funny but you have to look at the overall picture of what could happen. Rapes, attacks, muggings can occur if you are vulnerable - so one just has to hope that when this occurs your friends are there.
Going past the safety issues, blacking out is one of the most common causes for a good laugh the next day. "So you dont remember asking that guy If I text you, will you text me back?" "Omg you should have seen the way you were dancing on the dance floor, we couldnt tell if you were trying to do the robot or if you just forgot how to move" "You ate that sandwich like it was going to be your last meal ever. Oh and do you remember stealing those bags of chips as well?" "You stumbled onto the rooftop, just fell into the chair, arms in the air screaming ITS MY BIRTHDAY like everyone in the bar should know. And then you fell down the stairs as security was kicking you out, kept calling the female cab driver sir, forced your credit card into my hands and kept saying drink on me tonight"
Yes, we have all laughed about these scenarios with our friends a time or two. And everyone has been there at some point - if you havent then you just dont party hard enough.
Do you know what happened last night?
Blackout. Blurry. Missing pieces of the night. This tends to happen when large consumptions of alcohol are consumed. Most of us have been there, some way more often than others, where we cant remember what happened the night before. We need the help of our friends to piece everything together or sometimes we use our cell phone to see what text messages were sent or if any phone calls were made - looking for someone to fill us in on the details of the night.
Sometimes this can be scary, especially if you dont know how you got home or where any of your things are (most of the time your things are with your friends or hidden under your clothes on the floor). And it can be somewhat embarrassing when your friends are filling you in on the crazy things that you did the night before - like dancing on the bar, making love to that chili cheese dog that you bought at the hot dog stand on the street, puking in a garbage can in the beer garden only to go back into the bar and buy another drink - all in the name of partying.
But why do we "black out?" Sometimes you cant figure it out - how did I drink so much that I dont remember? The body works in mysterious ways because one can never say they are okay after a certain amount of drinks - it all depends on your mood, your diet for the day (aka did you eat a lot, did you eat nothing) how much water you drank all day, the type of partying you are doing, and the climate/area that you are in (blackouts tend to happen more at higher altitude due to the alcohol moving into the bloodstream faster). In any case - one can never predict when a blackout will occur.
There was a time in college that it seemed like it was inevitable that the nights that I was "going to take it easy" were the nights that I blacked out (and actually still sometimes happens to this day) I remember one incident where I woke up in my bed, tshirt on backwards, laying face up with my hands crossed on my chest like I was laying in a coffin, and uneaten pizza laying right next to me that I had no idea how it was paid for because it never showed up on my checking account and I had no cash on me that night, and my clothes laying on the floor of my bed covered in mud with some mud in my hair and fingernails. And i remember going "What??? I was only supposed to go out for a couple drinks!"
For those interested in knowing what actually happened, apparently the couple of drinks turned into a Cochran barcrawl with people I worked with, it started to downpour during the last leg of it and a couple of us decided to get into a mud fight outside Station, where then I turned and apparently ran accross the street to Papa Johns because I was hungry and somehow talked some guy into buying one for me, he was expecting something more in return but once the pizza was in my hands I bolted and ran home with it and passed out without ever touching it. Thank goodness for friends who whitnessed this whole showing.
Now obviously this is a pretty "tame" situation where one wakes up and doesnt remember anything - but its a good example of how alcohol can have that affect on you. Some of the most common questions I have gotten from friends when they wanted to know what happened last night was:
"How did I get these bruises on my body?"
"Where are my shoes?"
"How did he/she end up in my bed or back at my place?"
"Why do I have (whatever they found) in my pocket/purse?"
"How did I get home last night?"
"I just looked at my camera - I dont remember taking any of these pictures." "
Where did we go last night?"
Usually this is where I start laughing and fill them in on whatver I know happened. I am usually that friend who remembers a good portion of the night to let everyone know what went down (it is very rare for me to blackout and when I do - oh dear!) so I get to be the one to fill them on thier humourous adventures of the night. Sometimes, if I am feeling like having some fun, I make some things up just to get them really nervous.
But blacking out can have some serious consequences if you arent with your friends to help you along the way. Some people black out, and literally dont know how they got home, who they are with, and what they are doing. If this happens and you get separated from your friends, you just have to hope that you are safe. Yes, sometimes the situations can be funny but you have to look at the overall picture of what could happen. Rapes, attacks, muggings can occur if you are vulnerable - so one just has to hope that when this occurs your friends are there.
Going past the safety issues, blacking out is one of the most common causes for a good laugh the next day. "So you dont remember asking that guy If I text you, will you text me back?" "Omg you should have seen the way you were dancing on the dance floor, we couldnt tell if you were trying to do the robot or if you just forgot how to move" "You ate that sandwich like it was going to be your last meal ever. Oh and do you remember stealing those bags of chips as well?" "You stumbled onto the rooftop, just fell into the chair, arms in the air screaming ITS MY BIRTHDAY like everyone in the bar should know. And then you fell down the stairs as security was kicking you out, kept calling the female cab driver sir, forced your credit card into my hands and kept saying drink on me tonight"
Yes, we have all laughed about these scenarios with our friends a time or two. And everyone has been there at some point - if you havent then you just dont party hard enough.
Friday, February 18, 2011
It's All in the Personality
I admit it - I am not shy. I am loud, I have no filter on my mouth, and love to laugh. I can have a conversation with about anyone - hell, I could even have a kick ass conversation with a rock. It's what most people call an "infectious personality" that allows me to get along with just about anyone that crosses my path.
But sometimes its all in the other person's personality as to how a conversation with me will go. I tend to feed off the people I am with, and if you are dull well it just makes it that much harder for me to have a good conversation with you.. But give me someone who will give it right back to me and I am lit up!
I tend to notice this in my line of work as well. Being a videographer, I am ALWAYS working with people whether I am filming them, interviewing them, or working with someone on a video that they want. When I am interviewing someone, the whole process will go great if we have something to go back and forth with. I took notice of this the last couple days as I was interviewing and spending some time with some amazing athletes. The ones that I got along the best with were the ones that I could relate to, had some inside jokes with already, or we found a common interest to talk about. And it makes the process so much more fun!
And it totally makes a huge difference in the workplace. Being able to relate with the people you work with and having a relationship with them is great because then it makes the day go faster and more enjoyable. No one truly enjoys sitting in a cube for 8 hours a day starting at a computer screen - after a while it gets old. But the people around you make it so much better.Do you think it is noticeable when they put you in the cube that is right off the elevators, as if it is the "Hello, Welcome to..." cube since everyone seems to walk by it everyday? I am perfect for that cube, whether they knew that putting me there or not.
Personality is key to holding relationships with people as well. If I have a hard time talking to you, we will not be friends. End of story. That may sound harsh, but if I cant talk to you about things how can we hang out and actually do things together?? This has a HUGE impact on the dating scene as well. Last year I went out to dinner with thos cowboy who seemed like a decent enough guy, we hit it off via text message (again, thanks to our generation there are no voice conversations to he had for me to see this warning sign.) I was excited to be going on a date for it seemed like no one went to dinner anymore to meet someone.
However, disappointment central. We meet up for dinner and NOTHING comes out of his mouth. At first I am thinking maybe I intimidate him, because in awkward/uncomfortable situations I CANT stop talking - I think it is a problem. So I start thinking maybe its because I am hogging the conversation. So I actually stop talking. You can literally hear the crickets from outside the restaurant as nothing comes out of his mouth. I start asking him questions to get him to talk, and I could just cringe from the lack of information he gives me. As the dinner finishes, and I am literally on my 3rd glass of wine to make myself feel less uncomfortable, he goes to pay the check and this conversation arises:
"So, dinner was good. Thanks for joining me"
"Oh you are quite welcome, thanks for inviting me"
" I am sorry I didnt talk much, if you couldnt tell I am hard on conversation"
"No worries, its totally cool"
"Yea, I tend to have a problem where I dont know how to keep up a conversation"
"Yea, well its cool because I totally compensate for that if you couldnt already tell"
We just kind of look at each other, I shake his hand and say thanks again, get up and just walk out of the restsaurant never to hear from him again. And its okay. I wasnt going to push anything that wasnt there obviously, and for me the thing that has to be there is personality. Keep up with me and you are golden.
I think thats why I have some of the greatest friends though. They get me and my personality but MATCH it. If I am goofy, they are being goofy with me. If I am dancing on the dance floor, they are either right with me or sitting at the bar laughing at my ass. And if there is a lull in a conversation, it is not because it is an awkward silence but because we are sitting and thinking about how awesome our conversation has been going so far and are just taking a breather from talking. I am most comfortable around those that get me - and for those of you who have seen me at my best, then know you are one of my closest friends.
Personality. It can make or break a relationship, whether it is a work related one, one that is trying to get started off the ground, or a friendship you are trying to keep together. But in the end, it's about your take on the world. I love life, and cant be happier to be alive everyday. My "infectious" personality comes from who I am as a person, as well as how I percieve any situation allowing me to always have fun.
And if the party sucks - well watch out, because I might just become the party!
But sometimes its all in the other person's personality as to how a conversation with me will go. I tend to feed off the people I am with, and if you are dull well it just makes it that much harder for me to have a good conversation with you.. But give me someone who will give it right back to me and I am lit up!
I tend to notice this in my line of work as well. Being a videographer, I am ALWAYS working with people whether I am filming them, interviewing them, or working with someone on a video that they want. When I am interviewing someone, the whole process will go great if we have something to go back and forth with. I took notice of this the last couple days as I was interviewing and spending some time with some amazing athletes. The ones that I got along the best with were the ones that I could relate to, had some inside jokes with already, or we found a common interest to talk about. And it makes the process so much more fun!
And it totally makes a huge difference in the workplace. Being able to relate with the people you work with and having a relationship with them is great because then it makes the day go faster and more enjoyable. No one truly enjoys sitting in a cube for 8 hours a day starting at a computer screen - after a while it gets old. But the people around you make it so much better.Do you think it is noticeable when they put you in the cube that is right off the elevators, as if it is the "Hello, Welcome to..." cube since everyone seems to walk by it everyday? I am perfect for that cube, whether they knew that putting me there or not.
Personality is key to holding relationships with people as well. If I have a hard time talking to you, we will not be friends. End of story. That may sound harsh, but if I cant talk to you about things how can we hang out and actually do things together?? This has a HUGE impact on the dating scene as well. Last year I went out to dinner with thos cowboy who seemed like a decent enough guy, we hit it off via text message (again, thanks to our generation there are no voice conversations to he had for me to see this warning sign.) I was excited to be going on a date for it seemed like no one went to dinner anymore to meet someone.
However, disappointment central. We meet up for dinner and NOTHING comes out of his mouth. At first I am thinking maybe I intimidate him, because in awkward/uncomfortable situations I CANT stop talking - I think it is a problem. So I start thinking maybe its because I am hogging the conversation. So I actually stop talking. You can literally hear the crickets from outside the restaurant as nothing comes out of his mouth. I start asking him questions to get him to talk, and I could just cringe from the lack of information he gives me. As the dinner finishes, and I am literally on my 3rd glass of wine to make myself feel less uncomfortable, he goes to pay the check and this conversation arises:
"So, dinner was good. Thanks for joining me"
"Oh you are quite welcome, thanks for inviting me"
" I am sorry I didnt talk much, if you couldnt tell I am hard on conversation"
"No worries, its totally cool"
"Yea, I tend to have a problem where I dont know how to keep up a conversation"
"Yea, well its cool because I totally compensate for that if you couldnt already tell"
We just kind of look at each other, I shake his hand and say thanks again, get up and just walk out of the restsaurant never to hear from him again. And its okay. I wasnt going to push anything that wasnt there obviously, and for me the thing that has to be there is personality. Keep up with me and you are golden.
I think thats why I have some of the greatest friends though. They get me and my personality but MATCH it. If I am goofy, they are being goofy with me. If I am dancing on the dance floor, they are either right with me or sitting at the bar laughing at my ass. And if there is a lull in a conversation, it is not because it is an awkward silence but because we are sitting and thinking about how awesome our conversation has been going so far and are just taking a breather from talking. I am most comfortable around those that get me - and for those of you who have seen me at my best, then know you are one of my closest friends.
Personality. It can make or break a relationship, whether it is a work related one, one that is trying to get started off the ground, or a friendship you are trying to keep together. But in the end, it's about your take on the world. I love life, and cant be happier to be alive everyday. My "infectious" personality comes from who I am as a person, as well as how I percieve any situation allowing me to always have fun.
And if the party sucks - well watch out, because I might just become the party!
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Running - Is it Worth it?
I have always asked myself the question - why do people enjoy running? I am constantly hearing people talk about the 5ks, half marathons, and marathons that they push thier bodies to complete and then talk about the complete exhaustion but utter pride they have in themselves for doing such a horendous task.
Here, I can list three reasons why I dont usually enjoy running:
1. I have a bum knee. Yes this usually is an "excuse" but due to lack of ACL that went missing from a mishap in 2005, the doctor even told me running would not help the knee heal. BAM the doctor told me not to run.
2. I dont enjoy side cramps. Period.
3. Shin splints, sore ankles, hard breathing... sounds miserable.
My hatred for running goes back to my high school days, when in gym class we were required to run a mile under 10 minutes and trained for it every week. My freshman year I was on the volleyball team and worked out consistently so it wasnt that I was out of shape - I just hated to run. Later that year I got talked into joining the track team as a sprint runner - which lasted a week due to painful knee splints and exhaustion that just about killed me.
After that, you couldnt PAY me to run. The only time I ran was when I was running away from someone or chasing someone down. And even then, it would end with me on the ground huffing and puffing until it felt like my lungs were going to collapse. Why, WHY would someone want to run so fast that thier lungs felt like they wanted to explode?
I thought this way until someone told me it wasnt about running fast, it was just about the run. So I tried it in college only to fail due to lack of support from my knee. After 2 days of icing to bring the swelling down, I pretty much wrote off running for good. I was content enough to go to the gym and ride the bike, go on the elliptical, maybe even do the stair stepper - things that didnt require too much pressure on my poor left knee.
But now that I am out of college, I am living in Colorado, a state where EVERYONE seems to run. I mean, even bars down here host weekly 5ks to get people moving. For fun people run up the incline (which is 1000 stairs going stright up the mountain) and then run down barr trail, timing themselves to see how fast they can go. Really? I can barely walk up the incline without being miserable!
However, since 2011 is a new year for me and I am trying to do things as a Coloradoan- I mean, I even went snowboarding for the first time this year! - I have decided that I want try running again. With the support of some friends, and the fact that my knee hasnt felt this good since before my injury, I decided to give running a shot last night. I geared up and mentally prepared myself to run half of it and walk the rest, thinking that my legs would go into shock since I havent attempted anything like this since the Summer.
Low and behold - I did it. I, Megan, ran the ENTIRE 3.1 MILES of the Jack Quinn's 5k. I think about half ran/half danced into the finish line (probably could have been also that I had to use the bathroom sooo bad which made the last leg of the run miserable) but I accomplished it. I never stopped - I just ran at a slower pace. And finished it in 40 minutes. I couldnt erase the slap happy grin on my face last night, now fully understanding what my sister tried to explaining to me before about the "runners high" Hell, it was so good I have even contemplated running it again as soon as possible!
Does this mean I am a new found Colorado runner? I dont know. Only time will tell. Right now my legs are still feeling it so running is out of the question this week. But I feel like it could be something I can eventually get more into - however I would have to do it in style. There is some really cute running gear on the market!
Here, I can list three reasons why I dont usually enjoy running:
1. I have a bum knee. Yes this usually is an "excuse" but due to lack of ACL that went missing from a mishap in 2005, the doctor even told me running would not help the knee heal. BAM the doctor told me not to run.
2. I dont enjoy side cramps. Period.
3. Shin splints, sore ankles, hard breathing... sounds miserable.
My hatred for running goes back to my high school days, when in gym class we were required to run a mile under 10 minutes and trained for it every week. My freshman year I was on the volleyball team and worked out consistently so it wasnt that I was out of shape - I just hated to run. Later that year I got talked into joining the track team as a sprint runner - which lasted a week due to painful knee splints and exhaustion that just about killed me.
After that, you couldnt PAY me to run. The only time I ran was when I was running away from someone or chasing someone down. And even then, it would end with me on the ground huffing and puffing until it felt like my lungs were going to collapse. Why, WHY would someone want to run so fast that thier lungs felt like they wanted to explode?
I thought this way until someone told me it wasnt about running fast, it was just about the run. So I tried it in college only to fail due to lack of support from my knee. After 2 days of icing to bring the swelling down, I pretty much wrote off running for good. I was content enough to go to the gym and ride the bike, go on the elliptical, maybe even do the stair stepper - things that didnt require too much pressure on my poor left knee.
But now that I am out of college, I am living in Colorado, a state where EVERYONE seems to run. I mean, even bars down here host weekly 5ks to get people moving. For fun people run up the incline (which is 1000 stairs going stright up the mountain) and then run down barr trail, timing themselves to see how fast they can go. Really? I can barely walk up the incline without being miserable!
However, since 2011 is a new year for me and I am trying to do things as a Coloradoan- I mean, I even went snowboarding for the first time this year! - I have decided that I want try running again. With the support of some friends, and the fact that my knee hasnt felt this good since before my injury, I decided to give running a shot last night. I geared up and mentally prepared myself to run half of it and walk the rest, thinking that my legs would go into shock since I havent attempted anything like this since the Summer.
Low and behold - I did it. I, Megan, ran the ENTIRE 3.1 MILES of the Jack Quinn's 5k. I think about half ran/half danced into the finish line (probably could have been also that I had to use the bathroom sooo bad which made the last leg of the run miserable) but I accomplished it. I never stopped - I just ran at a slower pace. And finished it in 40 minutes. I couldnt erase the slap happy grin on my face last night, now fully understanding what my sister tried to explaining to me before about the "runners high" Hell, it was so good I have even contemplated running it again as soon as possible!
Does this mean I am a new found Colorado runner? I dont know. Only time will tell. Right now my legs are still feeling it so running is out of the question this week. But I feel like it could be something I can eventually get more into - however I would have to do it in style. There is some really cute running gear on the market!
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Can drunken encounters lead to serious relationships?
As most people know, dating has taken on a whole new toll these days. Men just dont go up to women anymore and introduce themselves, then ask if they can take them to dinner to get to know them better. Many interactions happen late at night, in dark very loud surroundings where one can barely hear their own thoughts let alone the conversation that is going between them and another person. I thought about this as I took in the situation that sat before me last night.
While at the Avalanche game with the girls, sitting casually drinking my Dr Pepper (and no, it had no alcoholic additives in it thank you very much) I take notice of the two girls that walk in and sit down right in front of us. One is obviously dressed for the occasion, having done her hair and make up and wearing a pretty cute outfit, while the other one is wearing jogging gear and looks decent but obviously not dressing to impress. I sat and started pondering the reason they were here, until in enters two men whom sit down next to them. One, kinda cute wearting a black hat but the other looks like he just came out of the woods hunting deer. Total hick.
Upon further observation, I begin to realize that these two separate duos were meeting up. However, did not come together. So now I am curious/nosy as to what brings these very different people together. Until I overhear this part of thier conversation:
Guy in Black hat - "So, did you two ladies wake up for work okay this morning"
Jogging Chick - "Omg I had an extremely rough day at work today. I almost couldnt get out of bed"
Guy in Black hat - "Yea, things got out of control last night. Didnt mean to do that many shots"
Jogging Chick - "Ugh same here, she (pointing to friend) had a hard time too"
Dolled up chick nods
Guy in Black hat - "Hey this is my buddy by the way (introductions occur)"
Dolled up chick giggles, plays with her hair awkwardly.
Awkward silence as all four of them start texting other people on thier phones.
At this rate, I have now realized that they met for the first time last night, where drunk-induced sparks flew between dolled up chick and Guy in Black hat. They wanted to meet up again, Black hat guy had tickets to the Avalanche game and wanted to invite the chick, told her to bring her friend he will bring one of his friends. However, they not only come separately to the game (which means Black hat guy left the tickets for the girls at Will Call. Again, got this from overhearing thier conversation), the dolled up girl now doesnt know what to do and just keeps playing with her obviously curled/done up hair, the hick friend and the jogging girl are making no connection, and Black hat guy is trying to make things less awkward by only conversing with jogging girl - but in reality hes talking OVER the dolled up girl and it just makes things more awkward as the hick friend is being left out of the conversation.
Confusing right? It gave me a slight headache was I was taking it all in - however I was enjoying it immensley. Especially since it was the only entertainment of the night being that the Avalanche were getting the butt whooping of the year losing 7-1 at this point (they went on to lose 9-1. awful!).
And that got me thinking. How do things like that work? Is it always going to be awkward when you meet up with someone you had met out one night? I thought about all the instances that my friends and I have had over the years, where we met someone at a party or at a bar and things hit off great. Good conversation, maybe some good dancing (sometimes karaoke), an exhange of numbers and maybe a good night kiss before leaving the bar with your friends to get some 2am Jimmy Johns and BBQ chips that your drunken stomach is craving.
The next day, the texting starts - whether you send the first one saying hey great meeting you last night, or he does asking how you are feeling that next morning - and you talk via message all day (for all you who may be shocked to hear this, these days people dont CALL each other anymore. There is no voice interaction, it is done all via text so that you can really think about what you are going to say to the person) This goes on for maybe a few days until that question comes up - when am I going to see you again? So now the planning occurs, but here is where things get tricky. Do you meet up for dinner and drinks? But do you do this alone, or go on a double date eaach bringing a friend for support (or to give you sober judgement on the person "YAY/NAY") Do you say hey, I will be pregaming with my friends meet up with me later in the night (so that you have some liquid courage in you before you meet up) and just do the whole bar scene again? Or do you go over to thier place/have them come over to watch a movie and just chill and talk? (this is the tricky one because you obviously want to play safe in case they happen to be a crazed murderer - so for all of you thinking of doing this just meet up for coffee or something in a public place first! Okay, that was my safety shpeal for this blog)
The best thing to do in this situation, that these duos obviously did last night, was to meet up in a social setting and bring a friend with you for support. Okay, so that gets set up. But now what if you dont remember what they look like? What if they dont remember what you look like? Sometimes in a dark, loud, haze of the night one's beer goggles could make someone look totally different the next day. So what if you are obviously disappointed when you meet up with them again? Do you take advantage of the guy and use him for free food/drinks for the rest of the night but then ignore is texts from there-on out? Do you stick it out, thinking maybe there could be something there that you are missing (goes back to my blog yesterday about the forcing of chemistry) Or, do you say hey I have to use the restroom I will be right back and then just bail, leaving them high and dry?
And you wonder why dating doesnt exist anymore. People like us overthink things way too much. And sometimes ruin things before they can even get started! Well, we left early in the 3rd period, so we have no idea how the night ended for these two duos. But in any case, one can maybe hope that they will all meet up again in the future and things will work out for the Black hat guy and the Dolled up girl. Or, in the sad but most common circumstance, the girls were not impressed with the friend selecion and decide its not worth going any farther and ignore further texts/meetings from here on out. At any rate, if you are single you are bound to have this happen to you at one point or another. And I give major props to anyone who gets into a relationship this way, because in all honesty it doesnt really work most of the time.
Maybe I will meet a guy at the grocery store one day, or the library. I hear there are good looking men to be picked up at these places....
While at the Avalanche game with the girls, sitting casually drinking my Dr Pepper (and no, it had no alcoholic additives in it thank you very much) I take notice of the two girls that walk in and sit down right in front of us. One is obviously dressed for the occasion, having done her hair and make up and wearing a pretty cute outfit, while the other one is wearing jogging gear and looks decent but obviously not dressing to impress. I sat and started pondering the reason they were here, until in enters two men whom sit down next to them. One, kinda cute wearting a black hat but the other looks like he just came out of the woods hunting deer. Total hick.
Upon further observation, I begin to realize that these two separate duos were meeting up. However, did not come together. So now I am curious/nosy as to what brings these very different people together. Until I overhear this part of thier conversation:
Guy in Black hat - "So, did you two ladies wake up for work okay this morning"
Jogging Chick - "Omg I had an extremely rough day at work today. I almost couldnt get out of bed"
Guy in Black hat - "Yea, things got out of control last night. Didnt mean to do that many shots"
Jogging Chick - "Ugh same here, she (pointing to friend) had a hard time too"
Dolled up chick nods
Guy in Black hat - "Hey this is my buddy by the way (introductions occur)"
Dolled up chick giggles, plays with her hair awkwardly.
Awkward silence as all four of them start texting other people on thier phones.
At this rate, I have now realized that they met for the first time last night, where drunk-induced sparks flew between dolled up chick and Guy in Black hat. They wanted to meet up again, Black hat guy had tickets to the Avalanche game and wanted to invite the chick, told her to bring her friend he will bring one of his friends. However, they not only come separately to the game (which means Black hat guy left the tickets for the girls at Will Call. Again, got this from overhearing thier conversation), the dolled up girl now doesnt know what to do and just keeps playing with her obviously curled/done up hair, the hick friend and the jogging girl are making no connection, and Black hat guy is trying to make things less awkward by only conversing with jogging girl - but in reality hes talking OVER the dolled up girl and it just makes things more awkward as the hick friend is being left out of the conversation.
Confusing right? It gave me a slight headache was I was taking it all in - however I was enjoying it immensley. Especially since it was the only entertainment of the night being that the Avalanche were getting the butt whooping of the year losing 7-1 at this point (they went on to lose 9-1. awful!).
And that got me thinking. How do things like that work? Is it always going to be awkward when you meet up with someone you had met out one night? I thought about all the instances that my friends and I have had over the years, where we met someone at a party or at a bar and things hit off great. Good conversation, maybe some good dancing (sometimes karaoke), an exhange of numbers and maybe a good night kiss before leaving the bar with your friends to get some 2am Jimmy Johns and BBQ chips that your drunken stomach is craving.
The next day, the texting starts - whether you send the first one saying hey great meeting you last night, or he does asking how you are feeling that next morning - and you talk via message all day (for all you who may be shocked to hear this, these days people dont CALL each other anymore. There is no voice interaction, it is done all via text so that you can really think about what you are going to say to the person) This goes on for maybe a few days until that question comes up - when am I going to see you again? So now the planning occurs, but here is where things get tricky. Do you meet up for dinner and drinks? But do you do this alone, or go on a double date eaach bringing a friend for support (or to give you sober judgement on the person "YAY/NAY") Do you say hey, I will be pregaming with my friends meet up with me later in the night (so that you have some liquid courage in you before you meet up) and just do the whole bar scene again? Or do you go over to thier place/have them come over to watch a movie and just chill and talk? (this is the tricky one because you obviously want to play safe in case they happen to be a crazed murderer - so for all of you thinking of doing this just meet up for coffee or something in a public place first! Okay, that was my safety shpeal for this blog)
The best thing to do in this situation, that these duos obviously did last night, was to meet up in a social setting and bring a friend with you for support. Okay, so that gets set up. But now what if you dont remember what they look like? What if they dont remember what you look like? Sometimes in a dark, loud, haze of the night one's beer goggles could make someone look totally different the next day. So what if you are obviously disappointed when you meet up with them again? Do you take advantage of the guy and use him for free food/drinks for the rest of the night but then ignore is texts from there-on out? Do you stick it out, thinking maybe there could be something there that you are missing (goes back to my blog yesterday about the forcing of chemistry) Or, do you say hey I have to use the restroom I will be right back and then just bail, leaving them high and dry?
And you wonder why dating doesnt exist anymore. People like us overthink things way too much. And sometimes ruin things before they can even get started! Well, we left early in the 3rd period, so we have no idea how the night ended for these two duos. But in any case, one can maybe hope that they will all meet up again in the future and things will work out for the Black hat guy and the Dolled up girl. Or, in the sad but most common circumstance, the girls were not impressed with the friend selecion and decide its not worth going any farther and ignore further texts/meetings from here on out. At any rate, if you are single you are bound to have this happen to you at one point or another. And I give major props to anyone who gets into a relationship this way, because in all honesty it doesnt really work most of the time.
Maybe I will meet a guy at the grocery store one day, or the library. I hear there are good looking men to be picked up at these places....
Monday, February 14, 2011
First Post as a Blogger
Well here it is everyone... the oh so coveted blog that I keep being told to write. In this blog there will be no hold backs.... I will talk about it all! Relationships, money, work, love - LIFE. I hope this is something everyone can enjoy and also be able to know more about what goes on in my mind most of the time :)
For my first blog topic, since it happens to be Valentines Day - and I am thus single - I want to talk about chemistry. And not the "Oh, we have chemistry together we work well together" kind of chemistry but the initial feelings one can have for someone. This stems from an instance this past weekend that my roomate and I were talking about on the way to work this morning. How can one feel "chemistry" the first time you are with someone but the second time feel nothing? And in both cases of being with that person, nothing was different how things went about?
This is a personal question that I have been stumped about since the days of high school, when the days of boys went from "eww he has cooties" to "hmm I wonder how he kisses." You have an initial crush on someone, go and make the move, things are going good... until about 3 or 4 "dates" (however you want to call your time with your boy/girl) in, and you realize maybe there isnt much there. This could be because you realize he/she is a jerk, maybe he/she is awkward and you have a hard time talking with them, or you find out they have a wierd fetish that you cant get over... either way the chemistry dies out.
But what about when you DONT know why there is no chemistry? That the reason why you went for that person in the first place happens to be the reason you want to be with them but there just is no passion, no romance, no feelings whatsoever. And you TRY it out, just to try it. And then boom its boring, awkward, and just plain ol' sucks. What do you do? Keep trying? Or just give it up and say "Hey, I think we are better off as friends." Or maybe, just maybe, you realize there never was anything there and you were forcing it upon yourself in hopes of having that something, that wow in your life.
As my roomate and I pondered this thought on our early morning drive this morning, I realized that this happens a lot in life. A lot more than you think. When relationships fizzle out, it's because the chemistry just isnt there anymore. When you realize you are interested in someone else besides the person you are with, it just isnt there anymore. When you would rather be somewhere else... yes I believe you all get the picture now. Is this a normal part of life? How is it some people are with the same person 2, 5, 10, 15+ years and others cant keep someone around longer than 4 months? When all they want is somone to be around a tad longer than that? Well, because, in all honesty, its a New Year, Valentines Day is upon us, and sometimes being single just isnt as much fun as you think it is...
Who am I kidding. I LOVE being single right now. It makes the weekends more fun when you play the game "How many phone numbers can I get this weekend" So, who cares if there is no chemistry in life right now! For all you single ladies out there, wave you hands in the air today because, maybe not today, but someday you will find that person to have that "Chemistry" with. Until then, I plan on going to watch men on skates hit each other over a small little black puck with three awesomely amazing single ladies. And we will have more fun than an an awkard/chemistry-less hookup.
For my first blog topic, since it happens to be Valentines Day - and I am thus single - I want to talk about chemistry. And not the "Oh, we have chemistry together we work well together" kind of chemistry but the initial feelings one can have for someone. This stems from an instance this past weekend that my roomate and I were talking about on the way to work this morning. How can one feel "chemistry" the first time you are with someone but the second time feel nothing? And in both cases of being with that person, nothing was different how things went about?
This is a personal question that I have been stumped about since the days of high school, when the days of boys went from "eww he has cooties" to "hmm I wonder how he kisses." You have an initial crush on someone, go and make the move, things are going good... until about 3 or 4 "dates" (however you want to call your time with your boy/girl) in, and you realize maybe there isnt much there. This could be because you realize he/she is a jerk, maybe he/she is awkward and you have a hard time talking with them, or you find out they have a wierd fetish that you cant get over... either way the chemistry dies out.
But what about when you DONT know why there is no chemistry? That the reason why you went for that person in the first place happens to be the reason you want to be with them but there just is no passion, no romance, no feelings whatsoever. And you TRY it out, just to try it. And then boom its boring, awkward, and just plain ol' sucks. What do you do? Keep trying? Or just give it up and say "Hey, I think we are better off as friends." Or maybe, just maybe, you realize there never was anything there and you were forcing it upon yourself in hopes of having that something, that wow in your life.
As my roomate and I pondered this thought on our early morning drive this morning, I realized that this happens a lot in life. A lot more than you think. When relationships fizzle out, it's because the chemistry just isnt there anymore. When you realize you are interested in someone else besides the person you are with, it just isnt there anymore. When you would rather be somewhere else... yes I believe you all get the picture now. Is this a normal part of life? How is it some people are with the same person 2, 5, 10, 15+ years and others cant keep someone around longer than 4 months? When all they want is somone to be around a tad longer than that? Well, because, in all honesty, its a New Year, Valentines Day is upon us, and sometimes being single just isnt as much fun as you think it is...
Who am I kidding. I LOVE being single right now. It makes the weekends more fun when you play the game "How many phone numbers can I get this weekend" So, who cares if there is no chemistry in life right now! For all you single ladies out there, wave you hands in the air today because, maybe not today, but someday you will find that person to have that "Chemistry" with. Until then, I plan on going to watch men on skates hit each other over a small little black puck with three awesomely amazing single ladies. And we will have more fun than an an awkard/chemistry-less hookup.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)